We don’t want to do anything except get people dancing!

They say, ‘Give the customer what they want.’   But the customer who doesn’t want to do anything except to get people dancing is asking for two things that conflict with each other. That is because most people need the bride and groom to do something before they, themselves, feel comfortable enough to get up and dance. There are some people who will dance no matter what. But, most people need you to do something just to help them to get in the mood. Take any wedding where there is nothing going on but dinner and dance music, and you will see less dancing than if you have dinner, dance music, and numerous weddingish type of things going on!  In fact, take any party that hopes for dancing: If you have some organized activities first, they work as icebreakers that will end up with more of the guests dancing later.

Why?

People need to get comfortable first. An organized activity helps them to do that. Dancing is a social activity that happens after people have already started to have fun together.  People don’t dance first and then get comfortable later.  Being involved in activities or watching the Bride and Groom do activities should be considered as foreplay for your guests to take to the dancefloor.

A better thing to say to your MC/DJ is, “I want to do things that will help people to get up and start dancing!”

How is a Father-Daughter dance like your wedding?

A Father Daughter dance has an irrefutable generation gap between the recipients. If you play the kids’ music, most dads won’t dance and if you play the dad’s music, nobody dances! It is easy to see that if the DJ is going to help the dads have a good time or help the daughters share anything with dad, she/he is going to need more than just music to do it! The DJ needs to initiate plenty of structured activities that encourage dads and daughters to play together.  But more and more dj’s just play music, and more and more dads just put up with a mediocre evening. After all, dad got a few slow dances with his daughter and he got her to thank him for allowing her to run around screaming with all her friends while he stood on the side. He didn’t know anyone so he kept to himself or simply nodded as other dads acknowledged that they all had the same problem.

How is that like your wedding?  Does your wedding have a problem like that? Well, in a way, it is worse! At father-daughter dances, there are only two generations and only an average of 25 years age difference between the two. At a wedding, there is often three generations spanning from age 20 to 80.  That is an age difference of 60 years!

But more and more dj’s just play music, and more and more dads guests just put up with a mediocre evening. Is that what you want at your wedding?

The answer is to celebrate what is important, and it is NOT music. Do we get together to celebrate music? Of course not, but the way people carry on about the music played at these things, you would think so.

The two things we are celebrating at both weddings and father-daughter dances are togetherness and family!

You need to work with your MC to include plenty of structured activities that encourage dads and daughters family members, friends, and guests of all ages to play together. Once you do that, you are focusing on what is really important. Now everyone starts to have fun! More people are dancing! But even the ones who aren’t dancing are having a great time!